tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3007302520478956179.post479230713291793943..comments2023-09-15T10:21:55.537-06:00Comments on Is It Just Me?: Thirteen Year Olds with Boyfriends... Some ThoughtsRandihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11851220760568533019noreply@blogger.comBlogger40125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3007302520478956179.post-83660779745137741842008-02-28T06:50:00.000-07:002008-02-28T06:50:00.000-07:00Great job, mom! :)Your post was beautifully writte...Great job, mom! :)<BR/><BR/>Your post was beautifully written, and you obviously have a good relationship with your daughter, which is extremely important when these and other issues come up. Being able to discuss things together really makes a difference.Nancy Facehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10468581601513912950noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3007302520478956179.post-68755783766552461572008-02-27T11:56:00.001-07:002008-02-27T11:56:00.001-07:00and you know I'm just kidding, right?and you know I'm just kidding, right?Vernhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13594878601026478892noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3007302520478956179.post-31989608142731919532008-02-27T11:56:00.000-07:002008-02-27T11:56:00.000-07:00satan's plan sounds more intriguing when teeangers...satan's plan sounds more intriguing when teeangers arrive, doesn't it?Vernhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13594878601026478892noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3007302520478956179.post-84845093930171363752008-02-27T06:41:00.000-07:002008-02-27T06:41:00.000-07:00My oldest will be 13 in May. She's homeschooled. T...My oldest will be 13 in May. She's homeschooled. That means a very limited pool of prospective love interests.<BR/><BR/>Whew!(For Now, anyway.)<BR/><BR/>I alternately take my older girls to work with me and indoctrinate them with a heavy dose of Dr. Laura on the radio who maintains a similar philosophy to mine about teenage dating and relationships. I pray that all that wisdom and teaching is soaking into them.elasticwaistbandladyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12643871078268503643noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3007302520478956179.post-27003112663459912492008-02-26T23:40:00.000-07:002008-02-26T23:40:00.000-07:00As a mother of three teens and three up and coming...As a mother of three teens and three up and coming...I feel your pain sister! This is a very insightful post and I agree wholeheartedly with everything you said.mindyluwhohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18443030788449986652noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3007302520478956179.post-43384130629535151742008-02-26T19:59:00.000-07:002008-02-26T19:59:00.000-07:00Hmmm.. my kids aren't there yet. I do understand t...Hmmm.. my kids aren't there yet. I do understand the struggle though... from both sides of the spectrum, because I remember being the 13 year old with a boyfriend. <BR/><BR/>For what it's worth, I think it sounds like you are doing a great job... the fact that you are concerned in the first place puts you far above the average parent of a teenager.Jenny P.https://www.blogger.com/profile/16632739365854048008noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3007302520478956179.post-48017717047731545312008-02-26T18:53:00.000-07:002008-02-26T18:53:00.000-07:00haha stoves, he**, todlers..good stuff good stuff!...haha stoves, he**, todlers..good stuff good stuff!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3007302520478956179.post-19424719776676718712008-02-26T18:52:00.000-07:002008-02-26T18:52:00.000-07:00I like that many of the commentors on this post ar...I like that many of the commentors on this post are deciding to tell their children ahead of time about the rules. It's much better when the rules are just known rather than new ones popping up.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3007302520478956179.post-40876118362261485222008-02-26T17:20:00.000-07:002008-02-26T17:20:00.000-07:00Great analogy! I can't see a 13 year old wanting t...Great analogy! I can't see a 13 year old wanting to do anything farther than hugging. I was always grossed out by the thought of kissing haha. Maybe I was just foolish...that was probably it.Busy Bee Laurenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04043024142115906584noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3007302520478956179.post-52277716004158144372008-02-26T17:12:00.000-07:002008-02-26T17:12:00.000-07:00Loved your stove analogy!Yesterday, after I read y...Loved your stove analogy!<BR/>Yesterday, after I read your post, I spoke with my kids and told them that at 13 they would, under no circumstances, be allowed to have a BF/GF. The 9 & 7 year olds nodded their heads in agreement, and the 12 year old said, "Don't worry about it Mom, like I've said before, there are more interesting things in life that girls...... like technology!"<BR/>I just hope he feels that way for a few more years.Jillybeanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12150574987267072428noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3007302520478956179.post-19796162011616657822008-02-26T16:46:00.000-07:002008-02-26T16:46:00.000-07:00Wow. Beautifully said. and you didn't use too many...Wow. Beautifully said. and you didn't use too many metaphors, not by a long shot.Caroline C. Binghamhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08883064932707416161noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3007302520478956179.post-41835601451338370942008-02-26T16:11:00.000-07:002008-02-26T16:11:00.000-07:00hi randi,your oven hot comment made me giggle, too...hi randi,<BR/><BR/>your oven hot comment made me giggle, too! i could almost hear you cracking up there.<BR/><BR/>so agree! amen sister! thanks for sharing our candid emails the other day about this. it is black and white to me. a little creeping in (like your frog in the pot of water getting hotter and hotter until it's too late and all that is left is regret) just doesn't work. we/they get too comfy and you're so right, then it seems like it takes more to "get and feel closer." slippery slope that we already talked of. but if you can keep them from the pot of water for as long as possible, everybody is better off. i know you know what i mean. i like how our church preaches this randi ... know what your decision is before you are even placed in the situation. when you already KNOW what your decision/answer is, when faced with it (and so many of us have been here and know exactly what i mean -- just insert any temptation) we will KNOW better what to say and do and will be less tempted. but put us in the pot of water, let it stoke up a little, let us get comfy, pretty soon we will turn up the water too and faster and before long, we won't feel like we can stop ourselves ... and then we will have so many regrets ... like you mentioned with the "wish i could do that all over" kids comment in your post. <BR/><BR/>you're doing great and you are a terrific example of an excellent parent to me randi. really.<BR/><BR/>and it is cute. your comments are showing up on my blog at THIS VERY moment while i am writing on yours. cutie.<BR/><BR/>blessings, <BR/>kathleen xoxo<BR/><BR/>ps. keep standing your ground. you have little cubs to protect until they are ready to leave the den.sogratefultobemormon.wordpress.comhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13141321969690842348noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3007302520478956179.post-69504030414783034182008-02-26T15:12:00.000-07:002008-02-26T15:12:00.000-07:00You have such a way with words, so fun to read! M...You have such a way with words, so fun to read! My kids are still young, but I dread the day I have to deal with this situation. It sounds like you are doing all of the right things...hang in there. Someday you'll both look back on these years and have a good laugh. (hard to imagine huh?)The Ditto clanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08784096516938830434noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3007302520478956179.post-72894518064765728792008-02-26T15:05:00.000-07:002008-02-26T15:05:00.000-07:00Just a comment from a "been there" mom. Teach her...Just a comment from a "been there" mom. Teach her what you just wrote about the hot stove (loved your 'turned on' pun btw!☺) and once you have taught her the correct principles, you have to let go and just have faith....which I might add includes lots of time on your knees. Relationships at age 13 are pretty fleeting for good kids, although it drives us as parents bonkers. You are doing the right thing. Now, just take a deep breath and relax just a wee bit. It will be okay. If she is as good of a kid as you are a mom, all will be well.Jodihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11872904214528321153noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3007302520478956179.post-51047067772100852552008-02-26T14:10:00.000-07:002008-02-26T14:10:00.000-07:00Oh yeah, thanks for promoting deep thought today.....Oh yeah, thanks for promoting deep thought today...Some days in my head, not many sparks are firing!ihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01471162630218692949noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3007302520478956179.post-80191421220526434282008-02-26T14:07:00.000-07:002008-02-26T14:07:00.000-07:00I always try to imagine how HF feels up there look...I always try to imagine how HF feels up there looking down on us...He has godly patience and all but how often does he just have to pinch himself when he gets the urge to just shock people that are being stupid? Maybe you could pray for a good shock...but after all, it probably wouldn't help.I guess that's why we hear that L & L story so much! The shock effect sure didn't last that long. It will be interesting to see how my 3, almost 4 yr old fairs. Hopefully I can teach as much cause and effect as possible while the price tag is low! As I write, he saw a knife and he picked it up. He knows knifes are sharp but I told him anyways to put it down. He quickly obeyed, but as he put it down he rubbed his hand across the blade, I'm sure just to test it and see if he really would get cut. It didn't cut him...but is it a but loco for me to wish it had given a tiny slice? Probably!ihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01471162630218692949noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3007302520478956179.post-31873666522841070772008-02-26T13:49:00.001-07:002008-02-26T13:49:00.001-07:00By the way I loved the hot burner analogy. I have ...By the way I loved the hot burner analogy. I have never heard it that way, and that makes it a lot clearer than some other analogies. :)Whitneyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12119308963577839203noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3007302520478956179.post-64364138137000822522008-02-26T13:49:00.000-07:002008-02-26T13:49:00.000-07:00I definately don't know what it's like to be in yo...I definately don't know what it's like to be in your shoes. I have 0 kids, so I don't know how difficult it actually is. I hope that everything works out for both parties (although, we all know it's going to be just a little bit more in your favor ;) ) Teenage years are the hardest, good luck :)Whitneyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12119308963577839203noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3007302520478956179.post-45158895849210730262008-02-26T13:30:00.000-07:002008-02-26T13:30:00.000-07:00I agree with the analogy. And if it is any consol...I agree with the analogy. And if it is any consolation, I was thinking the frog/pot thing too! lol<BR/>Great post!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3007302520478956179.post-17470994896452960532008-02-26T13:26:00.000-07:002008-02-26T13:26:00.000-07:00Oh Randi, this post is brilliant on so many levels...Oh Randi, this post is brilliant on so many levels. Please may I remember this as my girls grow up!Kimberly Vanderhorsthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01653757517652257445noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3007302520478956179.post-88812685059140893032008-02-26T13:22:00.000-07:002008-02-26T13:22:00.000-07:00corrine,21? That's for boys. For girls (specifical...corrine,<BR/><BR/>21? That's for boys. For girls (specifically, my daughter), the age is 35.<BR/><BR/>I'm just saying.<BR/><BR/>PaulPaulhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12971849965703470955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3007302520478956179.post-19075450395694957432008-02-26T11:48:00.000-07:002008-02-26T11:48:00.000-07:00my 13 year old son still thinks girls are gross an...my 13 year old son still thinks girls are gross and that has given us a whole bunch more Problems in the school yard. But I like what our bishop said Sunday God made us free and he gave us commandments to keep us free. He also said Satan is good at coming through the cracks of our Armor and the Freedom he offers is a mirage<BR/><BR/>And I also remember someone on our home moms list stating that she told her Child once that if they could find a Prophet stating it was okay to do what they were asking then it was ok for them.<BR/><BR/>I have been known to tell my son Here is the strength for youth and your scriptures, you know what your parents have taught you. Please go and honesty study and pray about the choice you need to make. <BR/><BR/>maybe Older siblings can help too?Ramonahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07920227550779547672noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3007302520478956179.post-36996782358467416482008-02-26T11:12:00.000-07:002008-02-26T11:12:00.000-07:00Sure, there are a lot of good reasons for her to h...Sure, there are a lot of good reasons for her to have a "boyfriend," but there are also a lot of good reasons for her to not have a "boyfriend." I think this is an instance where you have to lay down the boundaries and play the, "I'm the mother," and "because I say so" trump cards. As much as any teenager hates to hear it and despite how adult and grown up she may think she is, you're still the adult and parent.Janellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11092893864737058248noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3007302520478956179.post-59560600945251906772008-02-26T10:27:00.000-07:002008-02-26T10:27:00.000-07:00I thought this was a great post Randi!!I thought this was a great post Randi!!Tori :)https://www.blogger.com/profile/14963896000691417017noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3007302520478956179.post-89366230280597456422008-02-26T10:13:00.000-07:002008-02-26T10:13:00.000-07:00I also loved the analogies!I also loved the analogies!Super Happy Girlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15669901597597136922noreply@blogger.com