Thursday, September 18, 2008

Dear Lauren and Ted,

One of my imaginary and very wonderful blogging friends, Lauren, got married today in the Mesa Arizona temple. So I've been sending her wishes for all the happiness and joy in the world!! I had a chance to contribute my advice to a little wedding present for her, and I thought I'd share the post I wrote, in honor of her special day. Congratulations, Lauren!! ( well, and Ted, too, of course!)

Dear Lauren and Ted,

How is it possible to be so excited for and interested in the lives of people I've never met? Why the magical world of blogging, of course!

Reading Lauren's blog for the past year has been like a Stephanie Meyer novel I can't put down, even between chapters, because I know something exciting is around the corner. And now here we are at the wedding chapter. How did that happen so fast?


I think my best tip for keeping perspective in your marriage is to find a picture of each of you when you were in grade school, and frame them, and put them in your bedroom somewhere.

Sometimes when I'm really angry about something The Brain has done, I go to my room, and I almost always see his picture there from when he was in 3rd grade. It gives me a chance to think about that little boy, with some definite mischief in his eyes, but certainly no malice... and it helps me remember who he really is. He doesn't try to hurt me, or go out of his way to be unthoughtful. Sometimes, he just doesn't think the way I do (thank heaven for that!).

And sometimes when I look at a picture of he and I together, I can still see the little boy inside there - who Heavenly Father loves so much, and would like me to try to be patient with, and try to work things out.

The pictures just make it easier for me to remember that we're both still growing. We're doing the best we can, and it's a good idea to cut each other some slack.

It's no small feat to be worthy to marry in the temple. It's a huge accomplishment that requires goals and focus. The next phase of your life will be the same way. Set goals, focus, and remember not just who you are, but who you both are. You can do anything!

JustUs 1980something

Congratulations from the bottom of my heart!
Love,
Randi

21 comments:

Tori :) said...

I thought it was great advice!

Annie said...

Coming out of lurking to say amen, sister! (And I clicked the link to Lauren's blog and I can't believe she posted ON HER WEDDING DAY. That is bloggy commitment.)

Sometimes I have to do the time travel trick with my kids, too. Like when the teenagers are acting all teenagerish, I like to look at their kindergarten picture and realize they're still growing. Some phases are just easier to love than others, bless their hearts.

Annie said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Millie said...

This was a sweet post - loved it! I'm so happy for Lauren and Ted too. I came to the party kind of late but getting to "know" her has been really fun. And now you, too!

Marivic_Little GrumpyAngel said...

Beautiful post! You are so right on. I like the grade school pictures idea.

I usually try to find something I have in common with the bloggers I visit/stalk. Just like you I was married in the Salt Lake temple in the 1980's.

Kimberly said...

Oh the sweetness!

happy mommy said...

I love the childhood picture idea...thank you for sharing that.

Vern said...

Dontcha just love Sandy Puc'? I recognized her work instantly. Wait, that's not the point of this post is it?

Corrine said...

that was a sweet note. kind of funny cuz i had pics in our old house of both of us, and I'd look at his picture often and think wow he once was this little child...but never put it together like you just said...but kind of thought it...if that makes sense...thanks for sharing that.

Chell said...

Such a sweet post - she is quite the lucky lady, I also did a post in her honour yesterday :)

(We are a couple hours ahead in Africa :)

Love the pics of the 2 of you!!

mormonhermitmom said...

Interesting way to keep things in perspective. And the pictures are CUTE!

kristen said...

Those pictures are great. LOVE the 80s-style wedding picture. Awesome.

Thoughtful post!

Heather said...

Very sweet, and great advice.

diana said...

what wonderful advice you've given here.

have a great weekend.

Paul said...

It's crazy to see the temple so dark. When we got married, they were just finishing up the external cleaning of it. We had to get creative to get pictures without scaffolding in the background. You don't realize the difference until you see pictures from before.

Paul said...

Good post, by the way. I was sincerely touched.

I'm going to dig out pictures from when I was little, and give them to Susan right before I disappear to watch football.

Lippy said...

What a nice entry to come back to. I haven't been blogging much, but I quickly remembered why I like this blog so much!

I was going to hang a picture of myself from childhood, but it's chiseled into a cave wall.

Yours is so nice though...love that latest portrait of you guys!

Nancy Face said...

So very sweet! :)

Yvonne said...

I love the advice.

The pictures are so cute.

Lisa said...

This is really lovely. I'm off to go find a picture of me and hubby when we were younger. Except for me it would work backwards. He was such a rebel/hooligan, and I would just be grateful for how amazing he's turned out, even if he doesn't always "think the way I do". I love that idea.

Thanks for this great post.

Hannahkin said...

hiya, JustRandi! :)

i feel very intimidated doing this! nevertheless, i'll pursue with what i want to say...
i've been reading Lar's blog for ages now, and i absolutely love it! anyway, since i've been trying to extend my blog-reading, i decided to choose the authors of the coolest comments on HER blog and read THEIR blogs. and you were one of them! and i was not disappointed :)

your note to Lauren was incredibly beautiful and so true! i live a few hours away from Chell, in South Africa, so i've obviously never met her either, but i also care deeply about her and was so excited about her wedding :)

your wedding photo is beautiful, by the way... i love the all-white theme :)