Recently there's been a fun twitter meme going around called First Draft Movie Lines.
Basically, you take a famous movie line, and imagine what it would have been like in an incompetent first draft - you know, before it was rewritten into the iconic line it became.
Here are some of the more amusing ones.
"I'll get you my pretty. Or maybe your dog. No! Wait! Both of you! Yeah, both of you!"
"I feel the need. The need to fly this airplane really really fast."
"Houston, the shuttle's broken! This cannot be presented as an understatement!"
"Shaken, not stirred. And could you throw in a cute little cocktail umbrella on top? It would totally match my shirt."
"With great power comes... great utility bills."
"To Infinity, and... well, that just about covers it."
This boat is way too small to catch that thing.”
“The name’s James Bond. . . JAMES Bond.”
“Where we’re going, we don’t need roads. The car can fly. That’s why we don’t need roads. Just get in, I’ll show you.”
“I miss my sled.” -
“Frankly my dear, whatevsies.”
“You had me at ‘I’m not your brother’.”
“I want the truth!” “Fine! I ordered the Code Red! Just Shut Up already.”
“E.T…Update Facebook”
“May the Force be with you. Can I interest you in a pamphlet extolling the virtues of the Force?”
“I’m mad as hell, and I’m only going to put up with it a couple more months!”
“The midi-chlorians are strong in this one…”
“E.T. not phone home. roaming charges.”
“My Mama always said, ‘Life is similar to a box of cracker jacks; the prizes get lamer as you get older.’”
“I love the smell of maple syrup in the morning.”
“They may take our lives, but they may never…wait…our lives? REALLY?…I think alive and oppressed might be better.”
“If you strike me down, I will become a shimmering apparition with the power only to frighten.”
“The 1st rule of Fight Club is: No Fighting. I know - it’s confusing.”
“No Mr. Bond I expect you to die… when you see these wonderful hats I bought.”
“First rule of Fight Club: We take turns bringing donuts.”
“There is no spoon. …Use your fingers.”
“I see dead people, including you Bruce Willis, that’s right, you’re dead too, what a nutty twist that is.”
“Use the glow stick, sword thing that lights up, Luke.”
“The first rule of Fight Club is: everyone *has* to bring something for pot-luck Mondays.”
35 comments:
Thank you!
I will go change my underwear now.
We totally have potlucks at my Fight Club meetings. Funeral potatoes go very well with a shirtless Brad Pitt.
Snicker, snicker, snort, snort!
“I miss my sled,” made me giggle.
Those are great. My favorite was Frankly my dear, whatevsies. Thanks for sharing!
Love the cracker jack one!!
that word....
I think it means that the idea of something is so far fetched that it is not worth considering.
which clearly doesn't apply here.
Hilllllllarious. Loved 'em. :)
Too funny--now I have to admit, some of them I didn't know.
funny!
"I have an extremely uncomfortable feeling of doom about this..."
Those are a crack up!
I thought of this one:
You've got...comments :D
"what we have here, is a failure, to effectively share ideas and feelings. Now, group hug."
you rode a 15 yr-old boy straight into his grave...
and the rest of us, straight to this NEVER-ENDING TIMESHARE PRESENTATION!!!
funny stuff. I'm trying to think of one of my own, but I can't get the Fight Club quotes out of my head
I'm king of the top part of the front section of this boat!
We’ll always have,... that foreign city with the tall pointy thing, you know, they talk that funny language, what's it,... France?
I’ll make him an offer he might not refuse
Top Gun reference...
Speak to me now, Goose.
That could have taken away from that whole "talk to me, Goose" thing huh? :)
You've got to ask yourself one question: 'Do I feel lucky?' Well, do ya, punk?
(Dirty Harry doesn't need rewrites.)
Funny!!
Funny stuff.
"I have what doctors call a little bit of a weight problem. Basically, I'm obese."
Those are awesome! What a fun list :)
Um, Kristina? Everything goes well with a shirtless Brad Pitt.
Oh my goodness, these are funny!!!
Those were awesome!! :)
Those were funny...I've never heard any of them before! :D
Do the chickens have large teeth?
Buddy: I can fly! Can you fly?
Mr. Incredible: Fly home, Buddy. I work alone.
Bomb Voyage: Et, mon aéroglisseur est plein d'anguilles!!
My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius. Try saying that fast five times in a row. lol
The President of the United States just asked us to save the world. Anybody want to go get a latte?
OMGosh!! LOL LOL LOL Seriously... I'm totally laughing out loud.
OK. Who is this Dave guy? Funny!
badges, I don't think we need any badges, a little gold maybe perhaps some water but thanks for asking.
Badges, Uhh I don't I don't think we need badges. We'll go back and see if we need them, you stay here until we get back.
Oh, I needed this! Thanks for posting. :)
Post a Comment