This week was Lizzie's birthday. In celebration, we wanted to go out to dinner.
"Ok" she cautiously agreed. "As long as you don't tell the waiter it's my birthday."
"Sure," The Brain agrees, " I won't tell the waiter it's your birthday."
But Lizzie, being the smart little cookie she is (and having lived with her dad for a loooong time), didn't let it end there.
"Or the waitress, any of the serving staff, or any hostess or employee or customer in the restaurant."
He finally broke down and agreed to all her terms and we were on our way.
As we drove to the appointed place, she detailed how she had lived the day in fear of anyone mentioning her birthday. I mean, the mortification of having a whole class LOOKING at her and possibly even singing to her was more than she could bear. She was so happy to have escaped any embarrassment.
Mimi mentioned that she had heard the restaurant had a brand new birthday song they were making the servers sing, and she would kind of like to hear it.
You see where this is going, right? We couldn't resist the practical jokeness of telling the server that it was MIMI's birthday. We did it in a note, and The Brain was very very sure to point at Mimi. I saw him. He pointed at the blonde.
As we finished our food, the server came out with a little dessert and the accompanying parade of servers following behind.
Then to my utter HORROR, she walked around the table and set the dessert in front of LIZZIE, and started the loudest and longest birthday song I have ever heard. All 4 of us went sheer white. Lizzie and Mimi because they could not BELIEVE that we had broken our promises. The Brain and I because WE HADN'T!!
Lizzie bravely smiled and said thanks, then once Satan's Choir turned and left, the tears slid down her cheeks, as The Brain and I, both talking at the same time, tried to convince her that we hadn't done it! It was supposed to have been a joke on Mimi!
We tried to apologize. We tried to change the subject. Still the tears slid slowly down her cheeks.
Just send the "Britn*y Spears Mother of the Year" award to:
Horrible Mother JustRandiIt'll get to me, no problem. They know me here.