Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Undecided

I haven't decided how I feel about today, yet.

My baby started high school.

I dropped her off, and she quickly found a friend and hurried into the building, nervous and eager to start her high school career, and just like her first day of kindergarten, she never looked back once.

I drove away trying to decide whether or not to spontaneously burst into tears like I did on her first day of kindergarten. ( I know there's something wrong with that sentence, but it's really what happened.)

The known vs the unknown.

I've never been really good at change.

22 comments:

heather of the EO said...

ugh, I feel for you. Not that I know, since my boys are 3 and 1 but I sure try to imagine.
time really does fly, doesn't it?

Annette Lyon said...

My oldest started junior high a year ago. I went into mourning. I think I'll freak when he starts high school. My sympathies!

NF said...

OH MY! Keep your head up! From the child's perspective...it DOES get easier!



;)

Elizabeth-W said...

I cried like a big ol' baby when my almost 8 year old started kindergarten.
And I keep meaning to tell you I love your future therapy counter. Job security and all...

lusciouschaos said...

I wrote a similar post as my little 12 year old went off to Girls camp. I felt the pain knowing how difficult it can be to belong. She was fine. Shows us some of the unhealed spaces in our hearts.
Just think, if they don't go to High School, you don't get grandchildren.

Amy Peterson said...

The best parts of life are ahead of her! This is a great moment!

Melissa said...

I'm not sure what we'll do when we hit that milestone... I've got a few years to think about it I suppose... good luck with this new change!

Cynthia said...

You need to celebrate a "yahoo day" on the first day of school. Then you can spend your day shopping and lunching with other moms and your angst will be lessened. Then, when you have time to think about it on the second day of school, your tears will hardly be noticable because you know she already survived her first day of high school.
(our baby started high school yesterday too)

NG said...

Uh oh... mine starts kindergarten next week. Does that mean I have to bring a box of tissues?

Commiserating with you.

Chell said...

I think my mom also cried with all of us! Not to worry, Im sure she will get home and tell you how wonderful it was and that will make you feel a little better :)

Cheryl said...

I have sympathy, but not really empathy. School starts next week and I'm so flippin' excited!

Of course, this is because #1 will be in 2nd grade, #2 will be in Kindergarten, and #3 will be in preschool. For two hours, twice a week, it's just #4 and me! YES!

Of course, when they are old enough to be hitting High School and such, I know I'll probably be sad that they grew up so fast. But I'm not quite there, yet. And I'm okay with it. :)

Tori :) said...

I bet that was so hard!! What are our kids thinkin'- growing up and all?!?

happy mommy said...

Ahhh. My oldest graduated in May, and I had mixed feelings about it.

But I am not nearly as altruistic and mommy-ish as you are, I was sad because it meant I was old.

Heather said...

Awwww... she's all growed up, sort of.

It's ok to cry. Now, if it happens again tomorrow, I'll start to worry.

PS... How's Buddy doing??

Stephanette said...

I wish I could give you a hug. I hope she has as great of a high school experience as I did.

Good Luck!

Lauren said...

I think my mom must hate me...she has never shed a tear! Not one! haha just kidding...

She doesn't cry in normal situations like regular people. I think most of her crying happens in the card aisle at Target. She spends forever finding the perfect card for all occasions. Like, when I graduated high school, did she cry at the ceremony? No. Did she cry when she found the perfect graduation card? Heck yes. Will she cry at my wedding? Probably not. Will she cry when she finds the perfect wedding card? For sure haha!!

As for your daughter...don't worry. High school is the best! She will love it, and it sounds like she has a good friend to be with her along the way.

Two Princess Girls said...

Oh Highschool :). I can only imagine how bittersweet it must feel.

The Mom said...

Next year I will have one starting high school, one starting junion high, one in 5th grade, and one starting kindergarten. I am going to be a mess!

mormonhermitmom said...

I got a little choked up when my oldest started kindergarten. She's starting middle school. I'm more apprehensive about that because it was h--- for me. Now when my youngest goes to Kindergarten, in three years, it's going to take every ounce of self control not to shoot off fireworks.

Yvonne said...

My baby will start his LAST YEAR of high school. Not sure how I'm going to handle it. I keep thinking of next year when there will be NO ONE in high school--just in college. But I guess it's all part of the plan (at least that's what I keep telling myself ; )

Nancy Face said...

I loved high school, so I was SOOO excited for my kids to go and experience it! :)

Like Lauren said, I'm not normal.

Maraiya said...

I think I've teared up at least every time I drop my kids off for the first day. And it's not tears of joy. So not ready to have my heart ripped out by their becoming teenagers and adults who don't need me. Ever. I'm afraid I'll become a whining mom like Corbin Dallas' in Fifth Element. "You never call. Why don't you call? I could be dying and you wouldn't...."