Thursday, July 16, 2009

It's Not You, It's Me.

I have love, love, loved - fanatically loved - the alarm clock I have. It alternates between showing the time and then the outside temperature on the ceiling All Night Long. Some people might be annoyed at a neon red light flashing on the ceiling all night. But somehow - to me, it's become a sign that all is right with the world, and that there IS an outside world, obviously, because it has a temperature.

Except.
I have done something to the clock, and I can no longer convince it to accept my current time zone. No matter how many times I reset that dang thing, after about an hour it changes itself back to Nairobi time. Not even kidding.

3 nights ago I woke up in the dark of night and drowsily looked up to check the time, which was flashing 9:oo AM. It jolted me awake because I was supposed to have met my running partner Kami at 6. But clearly it was still dark, and even at 6 am it's not dark these days. So I slowly put two and two together....
well, it was more like I slowly figured out that I was back on Nairobi time, and then subtracted 8 hours off what the clock said, to figure out the time. Then I stared at the ceiling wondering whether Nairobi has daylight savings time, and contemplating the fact that I was up at either 1 or 2 am, or maybe it was midnight, and why was I lying here practically having to do CALCULUS in bed?

And that right there, was when my love affair with my clock began to go downhill. (and I think I even heard Gwen Stefani singing Don't Speak somewhere off in the distance.)

Because clearly any clock that forces me to do MATH in the middle of the night is NOT a keeper.

And anyway, these kinds of long distance relationships are much too hard to maintain.

15 comments:

Sue said...

Totally hilarious! I cover my clock so I can't even see the time if I wake up - I don't want to know so I won't have to do the math (how many hours/minutes do I have left to sleep)

Tay said...

That is too much math for any time of day. I like knowing the time at night too much to give up the neon glow, myself. I hope you find one just like it soon!

Dave said...

That sounds WAY too complicated to be worth it. Best to just cut and run. Maybe someday you'll find another like it.

Aubrey said...

AUGH! I have the same kind of clock with the same problem! (we even turned off the "atomic update" feature and it STILL can't keep the right time.)

I am nursing, and its the biggest PITA to try to figure out what time is REALLY is when my baby wakes up and I can't figure out if he really should eat or not.

Sigh. I love having my clock on my wall, but I can't handle the midnight mind games.

Emmy said...

Yeah, it is usually nice when a clock can tell you the right time :)

Heidi said...

bwaaahhhhaaa! Dump the thing, already! Get a Jeeves clock! Only, he won't tell you the temp. Just the non-crucial stuff. Still, it could make for a much better relationship when he tells you to go off and spend the day shoe-shopping. Just saying.

Loralee and the gang... said...

I HAVE to have a clock in the room so I know how much time I have left to sleep if I wake up. Very disconcerting to me if I have no idea of the time, even in the middle of the night. But that's just me. But FOR SURE I would not want it glowing on my ceiling, correct time or not!
:~D

Dave said...

bwy, did you know "don't speak" is a 5 star song?

Jillybean said...

So, does it show the outside temperature at your house or Nairobi?

Seriously, math in the middle of the night? It's just wrong.

goddessdivine said...

I would LOVE a clock that gave me the outside temperature. How cool is that?

But the neon on the ceiling, plus the incorrect time that can't be fixed.....that would bug. Sounds like it might be possessed or something. Might be time to cut your losses.

LisAway said...

Ha! I'd wake up my son who loves figuring out those time difference things. Sounds like it WAS an awesome alarm clock.

I have one that displays the time in HUGE green numbers. I think it's supposed to be the kind you can keep across the room from you so you have to get up to turn off the alarm, but I keep it right by my face. So I can read it in the night (bad vision). I HAVE to know the time every time I wake up.

Yvonne said...

Just break down and GET A NEW CLOCK ; ) I couldn't deal with that in the middle of the night.

Cole said...

I used to set my clock ahead 10-15 minutes. The only problem is I would wake up and then do the math. Same with setting the clock ahead in my car. I think to much for my own good.

Barbaloot said...

Nairobi time? What a strange country for your clock to fixate on.

Anonymous said...

I want a clock just like the one you started with. I have one that has the time on the ceiling but the temp would be great. If the day started out in the 90's I could just roll over and go back to sleep. Welcome to the far edge of a very hot nowhere.